One day I woke up late in the morning as I was so tired. I went to
kitchen and saw my mom almost running from one place to other and juggling
between various tasks - cleaning lunch boxes, cutting vegetables, preparing
breakfast and lunch. Daily I help her by sharing some or other work. That day I couldn't as I was already late. At last she was done with the work but I found
her to be totally tired, sweating profusely and from her uneasiness I realized
that her neck again started to ache, which is literally intolerable. My mom in
her 40’s wasn't able to do the daily chores all alone with the same ease that
she once used to. My heart sank by that sight. That moment I thought of quitting
the job and stay at home to help my mom.
I went to her and asked “Why don’t
you ask feroz (my elder brother) or dad to help you? Why you suffer by doing it
all alone?” She replied in a feeble voice by holding her neck “How can they do
all these? And why on earth did you get that thought?”I was struck by her
reply. Why boys shouldn't work in the kitchen? Is it something wrong? If my dad
would have helped her in all these years she might not have become as restless
as she is today. Moreover there is nothing wrong in my dad’s side as well, it is
only because he was not born and brought up in a society where he is expected to
help his wife in the daily routines. I don’t find any logic behind this and argued
with my mom on this topic. She outraged on me shouting “Don’t behave like this
at your mother-in-law’s house and bring a bad name to us!!”
I left for the office in a downhearted mood. I pondered over this. I didn’t
get answer for these questions- Why wouldn't these mom’s rise up for their
comfort? Why would they accept all pain staking tasks and do them calmly? Why do
they think that a man working in kitchen and helping her by sharing work is
entirely condemnable? Who framed all these rules?
That day I feared for the first time to get married. What if my husband
doesn’t help me at all and how can I balance the work at office and that at
home? I then emphasized the pain of all working women around me. Only less than
10% of them get the help from their families but rest of them silently undergo
this agony.
I then found the solution to overcome all these is that a woman herself
first should develop the self esteem and stop distinguishing between a boy and
a girl. A man should accept this change and perceive that healthy & happy
wife can bring in more happiness for the family.
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